One minute to the next, it's ever changing....

I am such an idiot. Last night after I got the text from Terry saying he was sorry and that he had to cancel this weekend, I sulked for about 1/2 an hour. I then sent him a text saying "you're kidding, right?" I realize that this was kinda bitchy and a bit outta line. He sent a message back saying "no, I wish I was..." I tried to call him then and he didn't answer his phone. 5 minutes later he sent another message telling me that he was still at work and couldn't talk...He never called me back. Truly though I don't blame him, he probably thought that I was going to yell at him or make him feel bad...*sigh*

Hopefully he calls today. If not, he's out-skys...My new phrase for people in general who mad-dog me is "You're not worthy of my attentions". It helps me to eliminate those who make me feel bad, cause truly, I am a spectacular person and deserve to be around people who know this and appreciate me instead of take advantage of my kind heart. I know that because of my kindness and niceness that I need to be a little kind to myself and not allow the emotional vampires to suck my life and vitality away. The changes that need to take place in my life need to come from within. I am the only one that can change my outlook and I am the only one that is going to protect me. Lesson learned...Or at least in the process of learning...lol!

Well, I don't know what else to do. Moving sounds like a great idea to me. Phoenix is looking pretty tempting to me lately. I can find work and cheap appartments...Lots of people and hopefully lots of real men to choose from! Also I hope to find myself there...Who knows what will become of me...????